Happiness

Much has transpired over the last few years of my life and even the last day or two that has caused me to realize that I am happy. I once wasn't happy, but now I am. It's not that life's challenges have gone away and life has become more simple. In fact, just the opposite. Between Bubs and Slou (who are wonderful), bills, a career, a business, a church calling, a church assignment and so forth, life has become more hectic and busied. One would think that my level of happiness would have diminished because I didn't have as much time for myself. What I realized is just the opposite, I'm boring and would rather spend time with others.

One major misconception with happiness is that people think external sources will make them happy. It could be toys, money or even other people. They think they will be happy when such and such happens or when this problem goes away. The awful truth is that happiness starts with you. You must want to be happy. Let me say that again, you must truly want to be happy. If you have some reason for remaining unhappy, then you will never be happy. Second, you must change the attitudes that cause your unhappiness.

Another major misconception is that being happy somehow shields you from the atrocities of life or that those that are happy don't have any problems. Again, not true. A happy person still has sadness, hurt, anger and heartache. They just have learned to deal with them in healthy ways so they don't become what life is about. Happiness is not a moment to moment emotion, but rather a general state of being.

Though bordering on trite, the old glass half empty/half full euphemism is quite accurate. Those that are happy tend to find the positive purposes in every situation. From a Gospel perspective, they see the light in the darkness and find the lessons in trials. Everything in life is a lesson to help them learn and grow. They enjoy the knowledge and lessons they receive.

It is not an exhaustive list, but here are a few key points that will help you find happiness:

1. You grow into happiness, not just find it somewhere. It is a process of changing your thoughts and ideas so that they breed contentment instead of contention.

2. You must accept yourself as you are not what you want to be. That doesn't mean you won't work on becoming better or that there are things about yourself that you don't like. It means that rather than agonizing over your weaknesses you accept that you have them and accept that as you work on them you will become more like the person you want to be.

3. You must be selfless. The key to ultimate happiness is looking beyond yourself. Having a purpose beyond your own happiness. That is why you grow into happiness. If you are too focused on fixing 'you' or making 'you' happy, then you miss the point. It is more that you focus outside of yourself and then down the road you realize that you have become happy.

4. Have a plan and a purpose. Set goals for your life and in all areas of your life. Know what you are going to do each day.

5. Lastly, have fun! Really, find time to have fun and spend time having fun with others.