Missive Monday #1 - Dear Bissell

Dear Bissell Lift-off Vacuum-

I am sorry to see you go, except for the fact that you shot sparks at me and almost set me on fire.  I knew then that your life had come to an end.  You were the first vacuum I ever bought.  I thought you were so cool because you had a lift off canister vacuum.  I could vacuum everything in my tiny apartment with you.

You were so much better than the piece of crap vacuum my roommate took with him when he moved out.  Shiny and new until my dad broke you within your first 6 months.  Thankfully you still almost worked.  Then I got married and was threatening to buy a new vacuum because you no longer were picking up the dirt.  I found out that day from the very nice Sears employee that I was supposed to change your filters and belt.  It was like discovering an old friend all over again. (Not really, but you just say those kind of things in a Eulogy.)

Then my children got to use you. You picked up mostly everything.   Except that you would clog and I had to get out the Shop-vac to clean you out before you would work again. As you neared the end of your life, you had a fatal accident so that you could no longer stand up on your own.  It's okay, it happens to many. Then your chord shorted out and you went down in a blaze of glory (sort of).  Now I'm buying a Sanitaire.

I'm sorry to state that I won't miss you one bit.

Yours always,

DRC